Tuesday, June 15, 2010

You sweet walls of protection, you kept my intimate enemy, my pet monster at bay. His fiery words meant to deplete my heart and soul, to cause utter desolation, you, sweet walls, kept me safe. I allowed you to be so strong. Powerful enough to keep me from feeling...anything, everything. That, my trusted old friend, is why your remnants must finally be cleared away. My heart and soul are pleading to be able to fully feel, the pain, the joy, but mostly...love, no matter the hurt I may endure. I had forgotten how  tremendous these emotions are. Thank you for keeping my soul safe through the traumatic years of  my silent struggle, but your work is complete. Now, feel this exhilaration welling up from deep within this protected garden. I get to live! I'm still alive!

Friday, June 11, 2010


Ahh, Dear Sister Hester, your courage to stand against the corrupt hypocritical legalism of the religious pharisees of your day is inspiring. Let us cast our sin to God alone, let Him cast those sins to the depths...as far as the east is from the west. To Him alone, He will judge. While you and I confess not the same transgressions, to God all is like filthy rags before him. We ask, does Heaven have a limit of Mercy? Hester, you and I know, only man limits his Mercy. You are a courageous woman. I have read this passage over and over, I understand you...while our sins are different, all the same, I understand. Let what was meant for evil be used for Good...In Christ alone can it be achieved.

“Woman, transgress not beyond the limits of Heaven’s mercy!” cried the Reverend Mr. Wilson, more harshly than before. “That little babe hath been gifted with a voice, to second and confirm the counsel which thou hast heard. Speak out the name! That, and thy repentance, may avail to take the scarlet letter off thy breast.”


“Never!” replied Hester Prynne, looking, not at Mr. Wilson, but into the deep and troubled eyes of the younger clergyman. “It is too deeply branded. Ye cannot take it off. And would that I might endure his agony, as well as mine!” 


“Speak, woman!” said another voice, coldly and sternly, proceeding from the crowd about the scaffold. “Speak; and give your child a father!” 


“I will not speak!” answered Hester, turning pale as death, but responding to this voice, which she too surely recognized. “And my child must seek a heavenly Father; she shall never know an earthly one!” 


“She will not speak!” murmured Mr. Dimmesdale, who, leaning over the balcony, with his hand upon his heart, had awaited the result of his appeal. He now drew back, with a long respiration. “Wondrous strength and generosity of a woman’s heart! She will not speak!”

~The Scarlet Letter, Nathaniel Hawthorne

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Monday I had the wonderful opportunity to go on the much coveted, 7th grade "Henry Ford Museum" end of the year field trip with my daughter, affectionately known as 'Bff'. This field trip is such a big deal, so many parents sign up to go that the teachers have to draw names. I lucked out! Woooohoooo!!
I chaperoned 6 girls through this very full museum. One of the girls fell behind...often. I can't remember how many times a during the day one of us asked, "Where is Zoe?" She was never too far behind, but still. These girls took pictures of EVERYTHING! They posed with everything. Of course, being the outrageously funny girls they are, they had to pose with every male statue in the building...and there was always one girl in the group pretending to kiss it. Emily. Each time I went to snap a photo, Emily would pucker up. I don't think there is a picture without her kissing something.
Managing six flighty girls was a bit chaotic, but I loved every moment of it. It was very interesting to see Bff interacting with her peers. What was more interesting was the society of this particular 7th grade class. All of these kids are friends. I asked the girls if there were any 'groups/cliques'? One very sweet and innocent girl responded, "What's a clique?" Perfect. Bff explained and the girls all agreed that there really weren't any. Everyone just kind of gets along. How wonderful is that? I have heard the school staff and parents talk about this class and how unique they are. I have to admit after spending time with them, watching them interact, I am thoroughly impressed. Not to say they are a perfect group of kids, but they have managed something special in the way they get along. Something I have not seen in middle school age children, especially the girls. Quite interesting.